Another year older...

Well, I recently celebrated my birthday.  And honestly, it wasn't too great.  The thought of being ANOTHER year older, and nowhere near marriage/kids, is kind of depressing. 

I would love to cowgirl up and get a positive attitude and say "THIS is my year!  THIS is the year it's all going to happen for me!"  But, ya see, I've done that.  Numerous times.  Like, a lot.  So...

It's very difficult to keep a positive attitude when you don't see any change or positive result.  I can honestly say that I had a very positive "can do" attitude in 2012 and for parts of 2013.  I was easy breezy about going out with friends to the bar (which I'm not normally a fan of) and pretty much went on any social invitation that came my way (date or not).  And I wasn't TRYING to meet someone.  I was merely open to being social and whatever that may or may not bring.

You know what it brought?  Nothing.  Not one chance encounter with someone while I was out.  Not one date that came out of someone knowing someone that might be good for me.  Not one exciting date opportunity.  Nothing. 

Now, I'm not saying that gives me permission to be negative 24/7...but one could see why it would be hard to stay positive and hopeful. 

And the other difficult thing, is that everyone else's lives are seemingly moving forward.  Whether it's celebrating their 10th wedding anniversary, another pregnancy, building and moving into a brand new home, going on a couples' trip... 

NONE of those things are going on in my life.  Now, my life isn't completely boring.  I obviously went on some amazing trips last year.  But, I do believe those trips would have been more fun if I'd had a mate with me.  I feel like it's somewhat boring:  living in the same house, same job(s), same hobbies...  I never feel like I have something cool to report.  And I know that my married friends may not look at their stuff the same way I do, but that doesn't change how it feels to be the odd one out.

Even the friends in my life who CHEATED WHILE MARRIED are dating people.  I mean, are you kidding me?  Seriously?  I don't get that at all. 

So, I'm going to do my best to try and get a little positivity going.  I can't make any guarantees, but I will try. 

Here's to 2014 being my year???