Thursday, January 31, 2013

Getting back in the game...

I wouldn't say I actively took myself out of the dating game, but I technically haven't been on a real date in *gasp* a few years?  I'm not necessarily embarrassed or upset by that...but that also means that I shouldn't be surprised I'm not planning a wedding right now. 

I've never been one to do the online dating thing, which I believe I've explained a few times on this blog.  Here, here, and here.

And I know that people rave about online dating and how, "You should really try it...it's great!"  But I just don't agree.  And based on the blogs I read...I'm not too convinced that it works - other than generating dates/meetings (which, I suppose, could be a good thing). 

Recently, a single male friend of mine and I were talking about online dating, and what we think about it.  And the truth is, I just can't wrap my brain around it - even after all these years. 

In real life, when a guy meets me, he doesn't see my "tag line" written on my forehead.  And he certainly doesn't see my "200 word minimum" bio written anywhere on my clothing.  He sees me.  And maybe he approaches me because of my looks or what I'm wearing or my hairstyle.  I don't know.  But, for whatever reason, he approaches me and we might have a conversation.  Now, that conversation could be short and we might instantly realize there's nothing there.  OR, that conversation could be longer and lead to setting up a date or something.

Is this too idealistic of a view to take?  Even in today's world?

I'm fully aware that online dating is THE thing and THE way to go, but have never felt comfortable in that medium.  It seems so abnormal to me and makes me uncomfortable to fill all that information out.  I mean, when I meet someone, I don't instantly know their educational background, how much they make, what industry they're in, and all of their likes/dislikes.  I feel like online dating (while a great tool to hone in on the type of guys you want) also takes some of the natural fun out of dating.  I'm also not keen on the idea of "shopping" for a guy.  Also, online dating can turn into a full time job, keeping up with the winks, messages, etc. 

Not to mention the fact that many online daters LIE about their height, body type, etc.  And they may post an older, more flattering pic, too.  Ugh.  Again, in person, you are what you are...can't hide that! 

All of this to say that I'm not sure where to start, if I want to really make dating a priority this year...as I'm about to get older and even closer to never having babies.

If I'm not into online dating (cheap OR pay sites), then what is my best bet?  I'm a very active and social person, definitely not sitting home alone on the weekends (or weeknights, for that matter).  But, most of my friends are married, so it's not like I have a crew of single ladies that I can go out with.

Any/all advice is welcome!     

Monday, January 28, 2013

Why are all the cute boys young?

So, remember when I posted about my co-worker/friend that people want me to date?  Well, nothing has happened there, which is fine.  I mean, numerous people think we should date - and not just MY friends.  I found out recently that his friends have bugged him about it or made comments to him as well. 

My gut tells me that he is not interested because he sees me as a sister type?  Or that he thinks i'm probably too old (which might be true).  I'm fine if nothing ever happens, because we are really good friends and spend quite a bit of time texting/working/running together.  Side note:  He also has recently been on a few dates with a new girl.

Anyway, my side job recently had their holiday party.  And trust me, other than the above mentioned friend, there are rarely any guys I'd consider dating.  I'm either not attracted, they're too young, or I just don't know them very well. 

So, I didn't really expect to see anyone all that interesting at the party.  Holy.  Crap.  This guy from one of our other locations came in and I about died.  Seriously.  So.  Fricking.  Attractive.  O.  M.  G. 

As picky as people might think I am, I've never really thought about how a guy dresses.  I mean, I expect them to be somewhat put together and not wear pants that are too short, but other than that...not much thought.  Well this guy?  Honestly, he was dressed perfectly.  If I could have picked what my perfect date would wear...it would have been this.  Nice, dark jeans, a button down shirt underneath a v-neck sweater. 

It was all I could do not to attack him.  I totally kept tabs on him at the party and the bars we went to later. 

Anyway, I did manage to introduce myself.  But, there wasn't a ton of contact beyond that.  Once I figured out his last name...I may or may not (don't judge!) have stalked him out on FB.  Based on my calculations...I think he's maybe 25 - at MOST! 

Dang it!  He's one of those guys that could pass for 30.  He doesn't look old or anything, but just looks mature and put together. 

I'm sure he didn't notice me at all, but boy, I noticed him!

The point of this post being - why the frick are all the cute ones so young? 

I guess the silver lining is that I still find guys attractive.  Sometimes, when I either haven't met any or have had numerous bad experiences, it's nice to be reminded that I'm capable of having the hots for a guy! 
 

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Stupid things people/relatives say...

So, I'm home with family, celebrating our Christmas.  And a few of us were at my niece's bball tourney.  I'm sitting next to my brother and yawning, often.  Literally, I could NOT stop yawning.  So finally, I say, "Oh wow, I am SO tired.  Can't believe how tired I am."  My brother, who has two kids, sort of laughs at that.  He then says, "People with kids hate it when people without kids say they're tired...cuz you don't even know." 

People have made comments like this to me before...and it ticks me off every time.  It was all I could do to not explode on my brother.  Let me break down the things wrong with a statement like this.

#1)  My brother KNOWS I'd like to be married and have children of my own.  So, how about we don't make an insensitive remark about something I don't have, mmmkay? 

#2)  I'm fully aware that kids are exhausting.  I'm aware that parents, of young children, in particular, don't get much sleep.  I don't need this pointed out to me, just because I don't have kids of my own.

#3)  Hmm, is it NOT possible that I could be tired, too?  I mean, is that not within the realm of possibility?  I don't understand.  Am I not capable of being AS tired as he might be? 

#4)  I work full time, plus a part-time job, plus another side gig, plus maintain a home, car, social life, family, exercise, etc. - BY MYSELF, with ZERO help.  I guess I think I'm entitled to be a little tired?

I'm not claiming that I'm more tired than someone with kids, but I also know that some of my friends who are parents say I'm much busier than they are.  And from watching my other brother spend most of the time we were home LAYING on the floor, nearly sleeping, I feel like he seems to get more rest than I do.

Have any of you experienced a comment like this? Do you share my frustration with it?

Happy New Year!

Whoa...I haven't posted anything since the beginning of November?  How did that happen? 

I guess November and December were pretty busy...but I didn't have anything too exciting to report.  Anyway, I can't believe 2012 is over and 2013 is here? 

I hope you all had a fantastic Christmas and are ready for a new year! 

My Christmas was fine, nothing too exciting.  I always take time off from work through the end of the year, which is nice.  Unfortunately, this year, I managed to somehow be busy for most of that, so it wasn't remotely relaxing.  I envisioned days of sleeping in until 10, lazing around the house, eating crap while watching something dumb on TV.  None of that really happened.  Oh well. 

I did get to see family, which was nice.  But, being single sucks a touch more around the holidays.  Since we celebrate Christmas AFTER Christmas, that means I'm home...alone...on Christmas Day.  I just think that sucks.  It's no one's fault, but it still sucks to sit there, alone, knowing others are with family, opening presents, enjoying the day.  I did better this year than last, but still. 

It's also a let down as far as presents go.  And before you say it - I'm FULLY aware that Christmas is not only about presents.  You know who SAYS stuff like that?  People who have always and still do get awesomely amazing presents EVERY year.  I guarantee if they experienced one of my Christmases...they'd change their tune. 

I, a single woman, spend a significant amount on my nieces and nephews (not to mention stuff I buy/do during the year).  And no, I am not saying I do/buy those things in order to get something in return.  However, I do think their parents could somehow acknowledge the stuff I do by giving me a nice gift or whatever.  As it turns out...each set of parents spent about $25 on me.  Mind you, I spent $35 A PIECE on their kids.  So...I guess I think they could have done more.  I'm not super angry or anything, but it does irritate me.

I think I will be spending/doing less, going forward.  That doesn't mean I won't continue the good relationship I have with the kids, but I'm just not going to spend as much.  It doesn't seem to be appreciated and I'm not rich.   

One of my best friends did give me some cool stuff - a book gift certificate to Amazon AND a heated throw blanket.  It is divine!  So, I was definitely given some nice gifts by others, which is great.

I was ready to be home and have at least one day of rest/lazy, which I did.  Now, I'm back at work and getting into the swing of 2013!

PS  I'm 99% sure I consumed 78,000 calories of sweet, sugary treats over the holiday.  Ugh.  I'm too scared to get on the scale.  The one redeeming thing is that I got some decent workouts in...but not nearly enough to compensate for what I ate!