Does anyone "get" what this feels like?

Any of my single readers ever feel like that?  Like you're the only one in your situation, surrounded by couples with kids? 

I've felt that way for a while.  Only now, I've sort of reached a very low point in my "I hate being single/childless" struggle.  And when you feel like that and no one around you is in remotely the same place...it makes you feel even more alone.  Ugh. 

Don't get me wrong, my friends are amazing.  Honestly.  When friends were handed out...I was given the best ones there are.  Seriously.  At any stage in my life, I've met wonderful friends who have been a great support system for me.  (There are always a couple of duds, unfortunately.  But ultimately, I've always felt pretty lucky to have the friends I do.)

BUT...

About 99% of my friends are married.  With kids.  And have been.  For a very long time.  Ya know who's still single?  Oh yeah.  Me.

None of my friends ever make me feel like me being single is weird.  Or that the clock is ticking for me to have kids.  But...when you're surrounded by people who are in a completely opposite situation as you, it makes you feel excluded.  Or, at least, it makes me feel excluded. 

I can't tell you how tired I am of being the 3rd wheel.  Or the 5th wheel.  Or the 7th wheel. 

And my friends invite me to stuff because they enjoy my company and know we'll have fun.  But it's still frustrating to always be the "single" in the group.

Anyway, I think people who aren't in my situation often don't know what to say or do.  Which makes sense.  And I think they honestly believe what they're saying.  But it's never anything I want to hear.

"Maybe you're a blessing to all these other kids in your life..."
"You are enough."
"God has amazing plans for you."
"It won't always be like this."

Those are a few examples.  And honestly, I can't say that I wouldn't say those things to a friend if the situation were reversed.  So, I get it. 

But let's be honest, none of those statements make you feel better.  I'm thrilled that I have so many wonderful kids in my life.  Seriously.  They are fantastic and I love them all.  But they aren't enough to make me be OK with the fact that I don't have any of my own and may never get to.  And, I'm sure that I am, indeed, enough.  But, I'm not satisfied with that.  And if they were single, would they feel the same way?  I'm a believing Christian (with currently wavering faith) and I've always thought God had great plans for me.  And I held onto that for a very long time.  But there comes a point where you think, "Does He?"  And, the same is true for "It won't always be like this."  No one knows that...but it's something to say (I understand).  I've always hoped that it wouldn't always be like this.  And yet, it is.  Ugh. 

And while my friends are a fantastic support system (only a few close friends know how low I feel right now), it's not enough.  Feeling like this and then coming home to an empty house?  Well, that does nothing to boost the spirits.  And no, my family knows nothing, other than I'm sure they know I'd like to be married/have kids.  My mom would freak out.  She worries about everything.  So, I can't talk to her about this stuff.  And my siblings probably wouldn't give a crap, if I'm being honest. 

Anyway, those are my random, rambling thoughts for today.  I know...a real pick-me-up! 

Thank goodness for my single readers who DO "get" what this feels like, to varying degrees, I'm sure!