Rude question...

A few weeks ago, I was at the gym, getting in my treadmill run.  A former co-worker and her husband came in.  I haven't seen them in a while, so it was good to say hello.  Her husband was on the treadmill next to me and we ended up chatting for most of our run. 

While it was good to catch up on their family/life and find out what was going on, I ended up being a little annoyed.  Because, as we were talking, he asks - "Are you dating someone?" 

Seriously? 

Here's what I've decided.  THAT is a rude question to ask.  It just is.  By asking that question, you're insinuating the following:

• It's not ok to be single.  There's something wrong with you.  I mean, if you aren't DATING someone...what EVER will you do? 
• If I answer that I'm not dating someone...it's now awkward for both of us.  I am supposed to feel bad and you just get to enjoy the awkward silence.
• If I answer that I am dating someone, then you're going to ask me all sorts of details about it - and I may not really want to share that with you. 
• And then you'll probably ask if I'm going to marry this person, etc.

I don't ever ask married people how their marriages are going.  Ya know why?  It is inappropriate to ask that question.  And it would put them in a potentially awkward situation.  Why doesn't this occur to people? 
Now, I know this guy wasn't trying to be rude, and was probably just curious.  But still...he shouldn't have asked that.  And he (and his wife) know me well enough to know that I would LIKE to be dating/married/have kids.  So, asking me that - knowing that the answer might be NO - is not wise.  Because, if I were dating someone, I'm 99% certain I'd volunteer that to you. 

I had another epiphany as a result of this little situation.  THIS is exactly why single people feel bad about being single.  Don't ask my why it took me this long to figure out. 

But here's the thing.  Yes, I want to date and get married and eventually have children (sooner than later).  BUT, it's not necessarily because everyone else has that.  It's because I truly WANT those things to happen in my life.

While being single isn't my choice, it IS where I'm at right now in my life.  So, I'm trying to make the most of my life and have fun.  2012 has been fantastic so far...and that's had nothing to do with dating. 

So, when married people ask me if I'm dating or whatever - it makes ME feel like that's what I'm supposed to be doing.  When, there are tons of people in the world who CHOOSE to be single - which is great.  It puts an undue pressure on me (whether intentional or not).

If I'm dating someone seriously, believe me, I will shout it from the rooftops.  Until then, please don't ask me if I'm dating.  Thank you.