Friendship over...

Hello friends!  I have no right to expect that any of you actually check my blog anymore, since I haven't posted in a long while.  Life has been busy.  Life has been good.  Not sure if those are excuses...but let's go with that. 

So, my last post had to do with a friend of mine who cheated and is potentially going through a divorce. 

Let me catch you up on that sitch:

I finally got in touch with this friend (let's call her WC) - after her avoiding me for weeks.  Prior to making a plan to meet for dinner, there were several text exchanges that were incredibly rude and immature on her part.  We had dinner in late April and she informed me she had feelings for someone else.  Now, to be fair, she had no idea that I knew she'd full on slept with this person.  BUT, she knew most of our other friends knew.  So, I asked if they were "dating," and she said they were.  And then I asked if things were physical.  She looked me right in the eye and said, "No."  So, I sort of repeated that again, giving her another chance, and she still said, "No." 

Not good, folks.  Not good.  It's one thing to keep this from me, but when I ask you flat out and we've been on rocky ground - you should probably tell the truth.  It took all I had not to yell at her.  I sat there and listened, never really came down on her or anything. 

After that, we didn't have much contact.  I made a few attempts to get together with her - and for some reasons, we just couldn't get our schedules together.  Uh huh.  BUT, guess who came to town a few weeks later?  PB.  You remember PB, right?  The guy I met at a race and sort of speed dated for a weekend? 

So, instead of messaging myself or WC's husband that he was in town...he ONLY messaged her.  And they went for a run, dinner, lunch, etc.  She was able to find all sorts of time to spend with him...but couldn't arrange something with one of her best friends.  Hmmm...

And...her husband asked her politely NOT to see PB, because it made him uncomfortable (rightfully so).  She saw nothing wrong with hanging out with a single, attractive guy - when she was supposedly "working" on their marriage.  She even chose hanging out with PB over her husband. 

This also confirms my feelings about PB, that he is gross and looking for action.  He KNEW she was having marital problems and contacted only her, when he's been friendly with her husband in the past as well.  ICK. 

So, WC and I have not really spoken/hung out in months, now.  She's made no effort and I'm at a point where I think she sucks.  I don't think I need to make any sort of effort, because I'm not the one who's done anything wrong.  I recently found out that she thinks she has nothing to apologize to me for and that I'm "making way too much" of this whole thing.  Really?

What am I making too much of?  Let me think...

• She cheated on her husband, a good friend of mine.  (Now, I'm aware that is THEIR issue, so I can't hold a grudge against her for that.  But, I still have some issues with her doing something like that.)
• She mislead me from the very beginning, putting blame on her husband and saying she wasn't in love with him...never was.  All the while, she was having an affair with this guy.
• She stayed in my home while continuing to mislead me about what was going on.
• She lied to my face when asked a direct question about her involvement with this guy. 
• She spent time alone with a guy I dated, whom I specifically told her I had issues with.  (I think this is hugely disrespectful.  I'm not saying she can't be somewhat friendly with him, but given her current situation, she shouldn't hang out with him.  And you'd think, out of respect for her friend, she wouldn't WANT to.) 
• She cut me out throughout this whole thing, when I was nothing but supportive from the get go (obviously I didn't know about the affair at first).  I spent extra time with her, talking things out.  There was no reason for her to think she couldn't talk to me about this.  (And she didn't cut others out.  I know for a fact she was socializing with other mutual friends of ours...but NOT including me.) 

So, if she could narrow it down to WHAT I'm "making too much of," that would be so helpful.

She and I have seen each other through millions of miles (running) and through the deaths of parents.  I guess, when you've been through that, I think you should be able to tell/confess anything to one another.  I'm not sure why she felt like she couldn't tell me.

And if she cared at all about our friendship...even if she doesn't think she needs to apologize, wouldn't you get in touch and find out WHAT is going on?  Wouldn't you want to save the friendship?

I think I'm going to cut my losses here and say good riddance.  It's a shame it had to happen this way, but I'm not going to just let this go.  She needs to be held accountable for her actions - in every way.  I think the way she's treated her still husband throughout this has been awful.  She is not the person I was friends with.  And if this is the "new" version of her...I'm not interested.

So, it's a sad ending, but I have to say - I haven't really missed her.  She has been critical in the past and made rude comments, testing my patience.  The funny thing about this whole thing is how she has always given me relationship/dating advice (unsolicited) - telling me what I should be doing. 

I gotta tell you...I've never been happier being single than watching this whole thing unfold.  Ick.  It's a good reminder that I am strong, independent, and have the self esteem to know what I deserve!