Friday, June 11, 2010

Jack The Stripper

OK, this is probably one of my favorite blind date stories. One of my close friends decided to set me up with a single co-worker of hers, whom she didn't know all that well. So, we decided to do a double date with her and her husband.

Now, I’ll preface this story with the fact that I wasn’t in a super fantastic place in my life. I was in between jobs, or as I like to say, on sabbatical. So I was in a constant state of stress, financially and emotionally. I wasn’t even sure I could sit on a date knowing that the topic of jobs would come up, and I’d have to say I was currently doing nothing.

We had dinner at a local restaurant and it went fairly well. I wouldn’t say there were sparks, but as a group, we seemed to be having a good time.

We went to a local bar afterward for drinks. All of us were chatting it up, having a decent time. Then Jack proceeds to tell a wonderful story, which is how he received the namesake of this blog entry.

He was talking about being best man for his brother’s wedding. He planned the bachelor party at a local strip club. Jack said he hadn’t been to one before, so he was sort of telling it like he was embarrassed. I was already concerned that this guy was telling a strip club story on a FIRST BLIND DATE. Hello!!!

Jack said when he walked into the club a stripper grabbed him and gave him a free t-shirt. She took him to a private room in the back, where she proceeded to climb on top of him and shake her boobs in his face. He said they were really sweaty and you could tell she’d been dancing a lot that night.

The whole time he’s telling this story, I’m dying inside and I can tell my friends are too. We were ALL trying our best to change the subject or do anything to get him off the stripper story. But, none of it worked.

We all said good night and as we walked to our cars, my friend's husband said to her, “Well, he just shot himself in the foot…”

It doesn’t even matter that I’m not a “stripper” kind of gal. Had Jack and I ever actually dated, I would NEVER want to know that story. That’s a story a man can keep to himself and think about whenever he wants, but it should never be repeated.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Things married people/parents say...

I think this will just be a running title...as I'm sure I'll have more rants in the future.

So, I'm leaving work today and I get on the elevator with a male co-worker. I let out a sigh and said, "Man, I'm tired." He then makes a "PFFT" sound, sort of insinuating, "Like you even know..." I said, "Oh, I can't be tired?" He says, "You don't even know, you have no idea. I mean, kids, they'll make you sooooo tired."

Seriously? Seriously?

So I sort of let him have it. I informed him that, oh yes, I too, can be tired. Of course I joked with him, but he did unintentionally strike a nerve.

I may not have kids, but I have other life responsibilities. Such as...working out, community activities, church involvement, cleaning the house, paying the bills, etc. Oh yah, I do the housework, groceries, bill paying, etc. by MYSELF. There isn't a second person swooping in for the assist on any of those tasks.

For example, today I didn't get home until 9:30pm, due to other activities (my choice, of course).

Again, everyone is entitled to complain, married or single. But, I very much dislike when married people/parents assume that since I don't have children, I have no idea what it's like to be busy or tired. In fact, many of my married friends have told me they think I'm busier than they are. Hmmm...

And if kids make you so darn tired and all you're going to do is complain to someone who would like to have them...WHY did you have kids??? (I reserve the right to retract this statement if/when I ever have kids and want to complain.) :-)