Friday, March 16, 2012

Um, ick...

Sorry for the break in posting. No major reason, but life has been pretty busy!

Anyway, this is a follow up to the last post about PB wanting to get together. I replied to him that I was going to be out of town and couldn't get together. He replied that it was a bummer, but maybe next time.

So, I figured he'd contact my friends that we hung out when he was here last time...which he did. They ran together and had dinner.

Anyway, I spoke with that friend a few days ago. She said PB mentioned his struggles with dating, finding the right person. I said, "Really, what ARE his struggles with dating?" She said he said he's looking for a fun, smart, athletic, and attractive woman. Um, hello? :-)

So then she said he mentioned to her that his issue with me was my religious beliefs. I am religious (not crazy religious, but I have firm beliefs) and he's an athiest. Now, I take NO offense to that. When I find out a guy is an athiest or doesn't have a strong spiritual side, I lose interest as well.

THAT is not the issue I'm irritated about.

Side note: he and I discussed a lot of major issues on our first date, stuff you usually shouldn't. Now, it didn't bother me, because we were having really good discussion. Did my heart break a bit when he said he was an athiest? Yes. Was I still trying to keep an open mind? Yes.

Ok, HERE'S what I'm irritated about. If my religious beliefs (which were discussed over dinner) turned him off/bothered him, then he would have known that when we finished dinner - decision made, right? Instead, he still came over to my house to watch a movie - and proceeded to initiate holding my hand the entire time.

Now, I loved holding hands with him...but I also didn't know he'd already decided I was "too religious." My point is, after our dinner, he could have easily said he wanted to take a rain check on the movie, or whatever. He had already made up his mind...and still came over, and THEN did the hand holding. What the heck?

I've talked to a couple friends about this and their immediate response was, "He wanted to see just HOW religious you were, and what you're willing to do. And when you didn't do anything physical, he probably decided you were a prude/too religious."

ICK.

I'm not naive, I know there are a ton of guys out there like this. But, I also believe there are guys out there who AREN'T like this.

I mean, what if I had gotten really physical with this guy? He would have gotten some free action...full well knowing he wasn't going to pursue me, because I'm too religious. And I just think that's shitty.

Side note: I loved holding hands with him...and if he'd made a move to kiss me, whatever, I would have reciprocated. I tend to be a bit shy in that area, so I didn't make a move. But I reciprocated the hand holding and leaned in close to him while watching the movie - so it's not like I wasn't showing my interest...in my opinion.

Anyway, if I wasn't already turned off by this guy...this clinched it. And if he ever does pass through town again, you can be sure that I'll be too busy to say hello.

I'm sure I'm over-reacting, on some level, but this just left a bad taste in my mouth.