Monday, January 17, 2011

How fast is too fast?

OK, we've now passed official date #2 with "Ben." The date went well and I had a good time. We finished it off by watching a movie at his house. Before your dirty minds go anywhere...it was all good clean fun. But, he is definitely moving things along. (We saw each other Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.)

So, when I got home...I had this weird feeling of, "Do I like him?" That sent me into a stress spiral for the rest of the weekend.

For all intents and purposes, this guy is doing everything right. I mean, he's a lot of the things I've always said I wanted in a person. And, I do like that he is those things.

But, I'm trying to figure out if it's moving too quickly? Because, I went from being excited that he's texting me...to not sure whether I like him.

Granted, we still hardly know each other. So, I definitely want to continue to get to know him and see what happens. But, I also want to figure out what my "deal" is!

I think I'm under a lot of pressure (unintentional) from friends. I can't tell you how many people ask about it...and then get overly girly excited. It's too much for me. I find it odd that they freak out more than I do! So, part of me feels like I'm going to be "in trouble" or "too picky" if it doesn't work out.

I know I need to just listen to myself and trust my own heart. But, I don't want to miss out on a great guy because I'm scared. I also don't want to force myself to date someone that just isn't a match (for whatever reason).

I am very independent and I haven't really ever had a serious relationship. My guess is that these are big contributors of my little panic attack. I'm sure my mind is thinking, "Really? This fast? So unexpected..."

So, for now, I'm going to keep seeing where this goes. And maybe, as he and I get to know one another better, I can just tell him that I need it to move slowly.

Any advice from my fellow bloggers would be much appreciated!!!

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Still going well...

Since our date last week, there have been more phone calls and a lot of texting! I have to admit, it's just good. And, to quote a fellow blogger, it's EASY.

Now, I realize that it's still pretty dang new with this fella, but it is easy. I don't have any of that phone call panic. You know, where you freak out when they're calling and then get nervous to call back. And then you get nervous about what to say...and then what they say, and then what you might say... You get the idea!

And typically, I ask my friends a ton of questions before I do something (such as calling/texting/whatever). Not this time. If I want to text him, I do. If he feels like calling me, he does. There are no games!

Now, normally, I would say that I wouldn't want to meet a guy in a bar, or discuss politics and religion early on. Those are pretty hot topics and I think it's best to wait a bit. Here's what's funny... We met in a bar (but not by chance), we discussed politics on our first date, and we discussed religion on one of our long phone calls. Luckily, neither of us are offended by the other's stance, so we're fine. But, it's just funny.

We like each other, plain and simple. And that, is a welcome change of pace from my usual dating debacles!

Monday, January 10, 2011

Part Deux - SUCCESS!

Finally, a positive dating experience to blog about.

I went out with "Ben" on Saturday night. We joined up with a few other couples at someone's house. It was a great night! We had great conversation (between the two of us) on the drive there and back. I think it was clear by the end of the night that we like each other.

I actually walked into my house and thought, "Yep, I like him. Uh huh." I never say that...trust me.

He and I discussed making plans to go out this week, so I figured I'd hear from him. Well, he texted and then called me yesterday afternoon. I'm so glad he didn't do the "wait two days" thing. We already have plans to go out this Friday. Yay!

Again, no matter what happens with this one, I already feel validated. When you like someone, you don't care if they call the next day (as opposed to someone you just aren't feelin' it with). And you want to see them again soon. And it feels comfortable when you're with them. I mean, I feel like I just know him. I'm not nervous around him at all.

Anyway, I'm saying prayers that whatever God wants for this, happens (whether it be what I want or not). Because, I'm just glad to be having a GOOD experience, for the first time in a long while.

Cross your fingers for me, blogger friends!

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Part Deux is a GO!

So, when I last posted about "Ben" Part Deux, I really wasn't sure whether anything would come of it.

Since then, there have been behind the scenes conversations, with me OK'ing the passing along of my number. I guess he'd recently been on a few dates with another girl, and wasn't sure if he wanted to see where that went.

I didn't really expect to hear anything until after the new year...if at all. Well, surprise, surprise! He called me while I was visiting a close friend. Wahoo! Honestly, when I got the voicemail, my friend and I were like couple of high school girls!

Anyway, I called him back the next day and he invited me to a party (where we both know the hosts). I think this is good. We'll go together, which gives us time to chit chat on the way, but still it's a low pressure, casual situation.

Since setting that up, we've talked on the phone another time, for about an hour. So far, so good. Conversation was easy and there weren't many awkward pauses. I mean, it will have been about 3 weeks since we've actually seen one another, by the time we go to this party. But I think that's ok.

It feels good to have interest in someone again. I mean, this could all continue to go well, or we might not click on the next meeting. Either way, as I said before, it just feels good to NOT have a horrible experience.