Monday, October 31, 2011

A new prospect...

You'll never believe what happened to me this weekend! OK, it's not that exciting...but still.

On Saturday, I ran a local race that a friend of mine won. I had to rush off to another commitment, but she stayed back to socialize. Anyway, she talked up the male winner and somehow invited him (a total stranger) to the Halloween party we were attending that night. (He is from out of state.)

Side note: Love my friend, but think it's totally weird she invited him to someone else's party and she barely knew him. But, I digress...

So, he ended up coming to the party and we chatted/hit it off. Numbers were exchanged...plans were made to get together on Sunday. Well...we had a coffee date...then a run that afternoon, and then dinner/movie last night.

Yes, yes, I know it's a lot in one day. But he's only here a few days and we enjoy each other's company. He's very attractive...let's just start there. Very. And, we have many similar views/interests, and conversation (so far) has flowed pretty easily. I suspect he's younger than me...by 5ish+ years. Not sure if that's an issue or not?

Anyway, so far, so good. Who knows if it's just a casual hanging out thing while he's here, or if it's potentially something else? He referred to last night as our first date...so that tells me he might be thinking in that direction. But whatever, I'm just taking it one bit at a time...no pressure on myself.

On the other hand...the friend who (sort of) arranged this is driving me batty! Constant texts, asking about every detail and if I'm SO excited, and what we're doing, and if I like him, and blah blah blah. She's suffocating me!

I know it comes from a good place, but it just adds pressure to a situation that doesn't need it. And really, we don't know what (if anything) this is...so how about we take it down a notch, shall we?

I'm going to need to tell her to back off a bit, because I don't plan to report my every single thought about him/us to her, or anyone else, for that matter.

On the fun side...while watching the movie, he totally grabbed my hand and it was really sweet. It didn't feel forced or awkward, which is how I have felt in the past with a guy that maybe I wasn't really in to.

So, no matter what, it was an unexpected thing - and if nothing comes from it - I had some fun with him and good conversation!

Monday, October 24, 2011

Rude much?

So...I had a situation recently that made me wonder if I was the crazy one. After discussing with several friends (married with & without children), I've come to the conclusion that I am, in fact, NOT crazy.

Here is what happened...

A few weeks ago, I got a text from an acquaintance. Now, I like this woman, her husband, and her 2 kids, but I wouldn't call them friends. We socialize maybe twice a year and I never call her just to chat or go do something. And I would never call/ask her for a favor, because I'd feel like I was imposing, since we aren't close friends.

Anyway, she and two of my friends (a married couple) were going to a big game that Saturday. She texted me asking if I could watch her kids for 2 hours in the morning. Now, it's not that I'm not willing to help out, but I was a little shocked that she'd ask that of me...an acquaintance?

I couldn't watch them the whole 2 hours, but offered 45 minutes - assuming she wouldn't take me up on it. Well, she DID take me up on that. So, I agreed to do it. (If a friend told me they could only help for 45 minutes, I 1) wouldn't take them up on it, because why inconvenience them for such a short amount of time, and 2) I'd figure something else out as 45 minutes wouldn't seem worth it.)

Later that night, she called me, and I thought she was just calling to say thank you. Well, she was... But then she said, "Well, we've pieced together child care for most of the day Saturday..." Oh, frick - she's going to ask me for MORE? Seriously?

So, she asked if I was busy at 9:30pm that night...and if I could go pick up her kids, then bring them home, do the bedtime routine, then WAIT for them to get home from the game, which ended up being close to midnight.

Here's the thing - I know that I could, SHOULD, have said no. But, being single and childless, I knew she figured I probably had nothing going on at 9:30 at night. I mean, what excuse could I give?

I agreed to do it, even though I was floored she was asking this of me. It totally messed up my previously "free" day to get things done.

When I got there the next morning, the husband said, "Thanks for doing this...we were trying to think, 'Who wouldn't be watching the game?'" Um, I actually DO watch the games from time to time and if I wasn't watching the game - WHY would I want to cart your kids around instead? Seriously?

Bottom line - If i'm not a good enough friend to consider inviting to the game, then I'm probably not someone you should ask to babysit your kids. And, by the way, isn't that what babysitters are for?

NONE of my actual close friends would ever ask me to do something like this, EVER. They were all floored and annoyed. To me, the whole thing showed a lack of thought, and a lot of selfishness. All they cared about was going to the game.

Side note - the kids know me alright, but not well. They had to ask what my name was when I picked them up that night...yah, we are SO close.

She did give me a gift card, so that was nice. But really, I'd rather have my Saturday back. I can get myself a gift card. It's the principle of the thing.

Lesson learned? First of all, I will never agree to do something like this ever again - unless it's for close friends who are in an emergency family situation. Secondly, I need to learn that I can say no and not give a reason. It wasn't my problem that they didn't have child care...it was theirs. So, I could/should have said I wasn't available, and then not given any reason. I don't owe them an explanation. This is something I'll have to work on, for sure!

As always, I love to get your feedback!

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Has this happened to you?

I headed to the grocery store last night after my workout. I only needed a few random items, so I was hoping it would be a quick, uninterrupted trip.

Do you ever just wish you could go to the store and not run into/see anyone you know? Don't get me wrong, I'm a social gal, but sometimes I just want to get in, and get out.

Lately, I feel like I always see someone I know, and then you have to chit chat (sometimes with someone you don't particularly care for), and then you see someone else. Before you know it, your 10 minute trip has turned into 45 minutes.

As I was walking in last night, I saw a woman who works in my building. We know each other enough to recognize, but not each other's names, jobs, etc. Luckily, she didn't see me...so I continued on into the store.

I quickly grabbed the items on my list and was roaming down an aisle, when I glanced to my right and saw Ben #2 in another aisle. I'm not gonna lie, I panicked a bit. And yes, I realize I was overreacting.

The last time I saw/spoke to Ben #2 was at a race in February, so it's been a while. We are still FB friends, but never comment on each other's stuff.

I will be honest with you all...I spent the rest of my time in the store, dodging and making sure we didn't run into one another. Then I headed toward the registers and saw him going there...so I hid in the candy aisle...where I totally put some mini Reese's PBs in my basket. Grrr!

Do I realize this is lame of me? Of course. Did I want to run into him and have an awkward conversation? No.

Here's the thing...I wouldn't say we were ever "in a relationship." We went on a few dates, my dad passed away during the time we were just getting to know one another, and then things fizzled. I don't regret my decision, as I don't think he and I are a match. However, I wouldn't say he and I are really friends either.

So, if I'd run into him last night...I guess I wasn't sure how the conversation would go? I mean, I felt like it would just be awkward/uncomfortable for both of us.

To be fair to myself, I'm pretty sure I would have avoided anyone I knew last night - I was on a mission to get my things and get home!

So, I checked out...and then saw someone else I knew as I was leaving. Are you kidding me?

Within a 10 minute span of time, I ran into 3 people I knew. Do I need to move?

Has this ever happened to you? How did you handle it? I'll take any advice I can get!

Ewwww...

So, last night, I'm on the couch, watching TV and relaxing.


Out of nowhere, a spider is on my carpet, quickly moving toward me. He. Was. HUGE.

Don't believe me?




All I could think was, "What the heck am I going to do?" Yes, I've killed numerous bugs & spiders before, but they were much smaller than this guy.

And then the worse thought, "What if I don't catch him...and he's just IN the house now, somewhere, waiting..."

After some very heavy breathing and a few freak-outs, I grabbed an old running shoe and clobbered him. But it wasn't over. I still have to pick him up and get him to the toilet, to be flushed into oblivion.

I grabbed a wad of toilet paper, that can only be described as a full roll of toilet paper, and went back to the scene of the crime.

I grabbed him, tossed him in the toilet, flushed, and proceeded to jump up and down in a freaked out, full on panic.

My new fear is that his family is still residing somewhere/various places in my home. That should keep me up at night for a while.

I realize I shouldn't want a man in my life solely for the purpose of being the bug/spider killer, but I really could have used a guy last night. I've been doing this stuff on my own for a long time now - and I still freak out. I'm never going to be the girl that is all, "Oh, no biggie...let me just grab that and take care of it..." No. I'm going to be the girly girl, freaking out, jumping up and down, clapping my hands in a tizzy. That is me...whether I'm killing the bug or I'm watching my fella (if only!) take care of it for me.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Another potential set-up...

About a month ago, one of my friends randomly texted me about a potential set-up. She gave me some info about the guy and asked if she could move forward. Because I'm apparently a glutton for punishment, I told her she could set something up, but keep it casual - maybe a group thing.

Cut to 3 weeks later and I'm on the phone with a mutual friend of ours. This friend asks me how my date went. Um, what? Huh?

I realize I can be overly snippy, but here were my immediate thoughts.

1) I'd not heard ANYthing about a date with this person for over 3 weeks.
2) Why would someone else that's not involved with the date, know about it before the person actually going on the date?

Things like this get to me...and it's largely why I abhor being set up. I informed the mutal friend that nothing had been set up and that I hadn't heard anything for a while. To which she says, "Oh, well I'll follow up with her on that."

Um, why would YOU follow up with her? Is this YOUR date? I don't think so. This is actually MY potential date, and I'll follow up with her if I want to. I don't really need you to intervene for me, I'm 34. Again, I know my friend thought she was helping, but I guess I'm just saying it isn't really her place to do so.

So, this friend checks up on the situation and then I get an email from the original setter upper. Apparently someone was out of town and that's why there was a delay in setting up. Anyway, now we are in the "planning" phase, potentially something next week.

When someone offers to set me up, and I agree, I guess I just don't feel it's my job to then hound them and ask about it all the time. I figured my friend had either a) forgotten about the whole thing or b) was in process. I'm not going to go chasing it down - especially when I didn't initiate. That's just me, I guess.

The other thing, our mutal friend has now been invited. A while back, I decided to stop telling people when/if I was being set up. Of course, I tell my blog readers - duh! But, it just got too hard fielding the many phone calls the day after a date and having to explain why I did/didn't like the guy/date. So, I find it's easier to keep it to myself and whomever sets us up and only tell very close friends or whomever I choose. When I went out with Ben #2 last year - there was no way to NOT tell friends, because a ton of them were there the night we met. Ugh.

It was a hard lesson to learn and took me a while, but I've committed to it! And I hadn't told ANYone about this setup. But then my friend tells our mutual friend and voila...people now know. And I'd prefer that friend isn't there, because she tends to tell me how I acted. Like, whether I looked at the guy, talked to the guy, laughed, didn't laugh, etc. I'm not a dream date, but I do know from experience that I'm totally fine on a date - friendly, animated, etc. So, I don't need an audience, thank you. I figured the "group" would be me, the guy, my friend and maybe his friend who thought of the setup? Random people...

So, you may read this and think, "Holy crap, she is highly sensitive!" And I get that. But hopefully you'll see some of my points?

Has anything similar happened to any of you?

Sucktastic...

Well, I've clearly been on an unintentional hiatus from my blog. I apologize, to any who actually read my blog.

It turns out that my bad luck has continued to spiral downward, since my last post.

I went to dinner and a movie with a friend, only to find that someone had keyed my car at some point during that evening. So, I had to pay the $250 deductible to have that little situation fixed.

Then, 2 weeks ago, I was rear ended...by an uninsured driver. Seriously? I mean, SERIOUSLY? You have GOT to be fricking kidding me! I got out of my car, somewhat startled, and he says, "Um, I'm between insurance right now..." Yah, I'll just BET you are. Police were called, I'm sure this guy is in a spot of trouble, and I have to run the whole thing through my insurance - of course. So, another deductible - $500 - is coming out of MY pocket.

If you are doing the math, that means I will have spent nearly $1,000 on my car this year - for things I had nothing to do with. Things like this drive me batty. I mean, my insurance will sue him to get the money back, but I'm not holding my breath that I'll ever see my $500 again.

Not to mention the minor whiplash I sustained - that's been super fun. I think my favorite part was having a headache for 7 days straight. Good times.

Anyway...things have continued their level of suckiness and I guess I couldn't think of anything to post about.

2011 has been a horrible year, I can barely think of anything good that happened this year. So, I will not be sad to see 2011 go - SOON!