Monday, April 1, 2013

Responsibility...

At what point do you have to just let someone who continuously behaves irresponsibly GO? 

Case in point.  There's a guy I work with who tends to drink more than he should when he goes out...and then proceeds to make the 45 minute drive home (he lives outside of the city). 

Now, you should know that we (his friends) have taken his keys, asked him to stop drinking/ordering drinks, offered a ride home, offered to drive his car, offered a place to crash, etc. - NUMEROUS times.

One time in particular...we were out to dinner and it was clear he should NOT drive home.  After what seemed like hours of convincing, we finally got his keys.  The plan was we would drive him to a location, and he would sleep there...then drive home in the morning.  He PROMISED us he would do this.  Well, we sent another friend to go back and see if he stayed.  He didn't.  As soon as we left him at the location, he got back in his car and drove home.

Now, there are a number of things that are bad about this.  He could get stopped by the police, and get an OWI...which would be bad on many levels, including his career.  He could get in an accident and hurt himself and/or others.  He could be killed.  Others could be killed.   

I think now is a good time for me to tell you how old this person is.  He is 30.  30.  30 years old.  I guess I would expect the above behavior from someone in their early 20s...but by 30, I would hope you would be a bit more responsible/cautious.

So, this past weekend, this guy, again, drank a bit too much.  Not crazy drunk, but probably shouldn't be driving home.  So, I guess the other guys had offered to give him a ride...and take his keys.  He told them he had to grab something from his car.  When they stepped outside, he had left. 

The guys came back in and were all worried.  Now, I'm not a horrible person.  I don't WANT anything bad to happen to him.  But I guess I also don't feel responsible for him.  If he drives home and gets stopped or in an accident, I'm not going to feel guilty.  Is that wrong?   

And they were trying to figure out how to track him down or call/text him.  Honestly?  I went ahead and left the restaurant.

If this guy is going to be so disrespectful to lie like this, I guess I'm not going to spend my time worrying about him.  Again, I feel like that makes me a bad person.  I don't care if he drinks, but pretty much everyone knows that you don't drive when you're plastered.

I guess I was kind of annoyed that everyone was trying to figure out how to chase him down, when ultimately, he made the choice to drink that much and get in his car - when he KNEW he had another option. 

End rant. 

Another dinner from hell...

So...it was another friend's birthday this past weekend, and she'd invited a group of us out to dinner.  I was hesitant to go, since I'm not feeling all that social right now, but she's one of the nicest people - so I couldn't refuse. 

Anyway, she told me my friend and his girlfriend were coming, in addition to some other co-workers of ours.  And then some other friends (whom I know) were coming. 

Well...I get there and immediately notice that it's ME and 3 other couples.  I absolutely HATE that.  I know they probably don't even notice/care, but it makes me acutely aware of my single-ness.  Ugh.  And then, the others show up...all couples.  Me and this other guy (whom I know and do not like that way, thankyouverymuch) were the ONLY single people there, among 12 people.

Side note:  my friend and his girlfriend - the PDA is unbearable.  And I say that without bias...as I'm just not a huge fan of PDA.  If I'm dating someone, of course I'm fine with holding hands or a peck.  It's the constant PDA that really gets me.  I look over and my friend's arm is around her, their fingers interlocked.  She went down to the bathroom and he asked if she wanted him to go with her.  She said no...and he still followed her down.  They were touchy feely the whole night.  I'm horrible, I know. 

Anyway... 

For starters, the girl next to me.  OMG.  She's fine, but not the most fun to talk to.  She's a bit of a bragger.  And also...can't stop talking.  Even if I had wanted to talk to anyone else at the table, I couldn't have.  Because she was constantly blabbing in my ear for the duration of the evening.  I even had my phone out, sort of purposely being a little rude...and that didn't stop her.  And the stuff she was blabbing about?  Not anything remotely interesting.  At.  All. 

So, I did make some effort to talk with others at the table.  But, I do think things with my friend are officially weird.  He had texted me "looking forward to catching up with you," and yet, we hardly spoke 2 words the entire night.  In fact, I was the one who said good night.  So, that pretty much sucks. 

To make matters worse, somehow, my single-ness became a topic of conversation/center of attention.  I promise you, I didn't say a WORD about it.  Duh.  WHY would I want to discuss that in a large group of people - none of whom I'm particularly close to?  And why didn't they talk about the other single's single-ness?  Argh! 

So, at one point, someone said, "It'll happen for you...it happened for me at 49!"  Um, is that supposed to cheer me up?  Because that just made me sad.  Like, really sad.  (And she was married twice before this guy)  One of the other girls started talking about this guy at her gym and how I should stop by and check him out.  OK, I don't belong to her gym...so, I'm supposed to stop by?  And what do I do once I'm there?  Seriously.  Then her husband pulls up one of his employees on FB, to show me a pic.  And they start asking me about him. 

OMG. So. Uncomfortable.

At this point, we were still waiting for our food.  It took forever!  My salad finally arrives and I start eating...it's after 9pm at this point.  Well, part way through, I notice a rubber band in my salad.  Now, I'm not a snob, but I do think restaurants should probably check what they're sending out.  I mean, it was pretty obvious.  So, the waiter took it back and brought me another one.  It's now 9:35...and I really don't care about eating.  So, I box it up to go.  I was still charged for the salad.  Everyone thought that it should have been comped...and I agree.  Whatever.  Annoying. 

Things wind down and we all head downstairs to leave.  Like I said, I had to say, "Goodbye A, N, and P."  And I think my friend said bye, but there was no other conversation.  And we used to text NON-STOP, talk on the phone, run together, etc.  So, that is weird. 

I left in a pretty crappy mood and kind of wanted to scream when I got in my car.  Instead, I ate a Cadbury Egg when I got home.  I'm sure that resolved something, right?